Monday, 15 June 2009

Breaking The Seal

There are some things in life to which you want to be first.

I'm not talking about the North Pole, the finish line of the New York marathon or the handbag department of Selfridges on Boxing Day.

No, what I find the most satisfying of all is being the first person to plunge a knife into a brand new pot of Marmite. Penetrating the slight oily sheen and carving down into the murky depths of its rich, black goodness, leaving an almost perfectly hemispherical scar in the otherwise pristine surface.

Clearly, this is not limited to Marmite; many other spreads lend themselves to this phenomena. Peanut butter (smooth more than crunchy) is good, as is Nutella.

However, although you'd think they might, pots of jam & marmalade really don't give that same exhilarating feeling of being the one to break virgin territory. And honey is rubbish as it 'self-heals'.

So what do you like to be first to?

First person to say '...point out that you have ended your sentence with a preposition' owes me a bag of Twiglets.


  1. The peanut butter is a big one for me. But as I am the only one in my house to eat it I know I have no competition for it and so it is slightly less enjoyable than it once was.

  2. i rather like sticking the spoon through the papery foil at the top of a jar of instant coffee. can't stand instant coffee obviously tho, so it's a bit of a waste.

  3. @Chris: The Meaning Of Liff came up with a word for the noise that makes, if I recall correctly. I think it was 'Fot'. Anyone have the book to hand?

  4. yep, spoon through the foil of a jar of instant coffee is excellent, although slightly marred by the fact that instant coffee is ack.

    I like opening bags of ground coffee (the smell is awesome), breaking the seal on a bottle of spirits (that glug glug sound of the first glass poured) and like opening the sort of things that are set or frozen in an ornate manner - like a tub of carte d'or or something similar.

  5. First dip in the marmite is definitely up there, but smooth peanut better has to win. It HAS TO.

  6. Marmite? Peanut Butter?


    I like to be the first person to walk in fresh snow, and i like to be the first on the bus, so i can run to the back and push all the teenagers out of the way.