Overheard #56

All similes, all the time:

I was drawn to it like a moth to a drum solo.

Four Charity

I forgot to say previously that long-time Spuds fan Julian and I have had a small wager over the last few seasons, involving who would finish higher in the league at the end of the season. 

So far, he owes me £40. 

Given the appalling start by his lot this year, I took pity and agreed to bundle the winnings onto last night's match, double or quits again - Arsenal win, £80 to me; Spurs win, debt wiped out.

Of course, it was only a draw! So the money is going to charity (Macmillan Cancer Support, in case you were interested)

See, some good does come out of gambling (we still should have won though....grrrrr)

Four Heavens Sake

Last night I arranged to meet Jason at the East Dulwich Tavern to watch the football, something that happens far too infrequently due to our 'busy social schedules' (him launching record labels; me mostly reading The Gruffalo). Anyway at half-time in a thrilling end-to-end North London derby, I turned to him and said:

"You know what, mate, this could end four-all..."

Guess what.

Arsenal 4 - 4 Tottenham Hotspur

I wouldn't mind -- it was top quality entertainment -- but we threw away a two-goal lead in the last minute. Super goal from Jenas to make it 4-3 but why, oh why can't we kill a game off? Some of the most talented young players of a generation and they give possession away in their own half, forget to close the opposition down and allow the smallest player on the pitch to sneak in for a rebound off the post. We went to sleep and paid the price. Wenger must be fuming; I know I am.

*fumes*

White/Black Swans

Beautiful looking prototype game where you shoot black paintballs to reveal your entirely white surroundings (and vice versa). Watch the demo here:

The Unfinished Swan

(I wonder if the game might end when you run out of paint and are left, wandering alone and snow-blind in a colourless wilderness.)

Overheard #55

This just in by pigeon from our North of England correspondent:

"What's five pounds in Swedish Francs?"

Particle Me Elmo*

Whilst putting Freyja to bed the other evening, we were just getting to the end of The Gruffalo when she suddenly came out with "Do you know what, Daddy, when I grow up, I want to be a particle physicist". OK, she didn't really, but I might have to get her these anyway:

The Particle Zoo: Subatomic Particle Softies

Not bad for a fiver each. Oh, hang on, shocking £/$ exchange rate recalculation coming up, more like £6.50! Personal favourite is the Gluon (closely followed by the ninja-like Neutrinos!)


* oh come on, I thought that was rather good.

On Yer Bike

Say what you like about Clarkson, but he and I are in total agreement about the ridiculous world of the motorbike:

Jeremy Clarkson Vespa review

"What I’m trying to say here is that, yes, bikes and cars are both forms of transport, but they have nothing in common. Imagining that you can ride a bike because you can drive a car is like imagining you can swallow-dive off a 90ft cliff because you can play table tennis."

Make It So(ny)

It. Is. Done.

A life-changing event has befallen us. Our inner sanctum will never be the same again. Let us breathe deeply, cast out thoughts of ancient times and reach out -- onwards, upwards to a new beginning. This is Day One, Ground Zero, Point Break, Face Off, Layer Cake, Don't Tell Mom The Babysitters Dead [stop now - Movie Ed.]. It's the launchpad to a better world. To infinity ... and beyond.

Yes, I've got a new phone.

But are you sitting down?

Because it's not a Nokia.

*pause for collective gasp of gathered crowd, smelling salts to be liberally applied, children removed to a safe haven and learnéd philosophers to be consulted as to whether the Earth is still on its axis*

Currently nestled in my slightly-clammy palm is a shiny new SonyEricsson C902. It's lovely. Sleek, understated graphite design. Crisp, clear screen & responsive keypad. Quad-band, 3G HSDPA and Bluetooth. MP3/AAC/FM radio and really impressive sound quality. Clever touchscreen 'hotspot' features for the camera options. Oh, did I mention the camera? 5.0 megapixel -- with a flash. A flash I tell you! On a phone!

But the best bit, the thing that makes me grin like a moron, is how you activate the lens cover. You slide the end of the phone out - like Bond' Minolta spy camera in OHMSS! Look, here in this somewhat OTT promo video:



Yes, yes, I'm sure there'll be a new one out in about, oooh, fifteen minutes that makes mine appear like this, but for the moment I simply don't care. Loyal readers (and anyone unlucky enough to get caught at the bar with me) will know that I have roundly derided Sony for its ongoing proprietary attitude to file formats, memory sticks and the like but I'll forgive them (for a bit, natch) on the back of this shiny little bit of gadgety goodness.

Sorry, Nokia, but just so you know where I am -- I'm out. It's been fun. But my head has been turned by the dark side, mwahahahahaha.

Right, who shall I call?

Straight To Hull

Whether you are a believer or not, you have to admit this is rather good:

Atheist Bus Campaign

The Atheist Bus Campaign launches today, Tuesday October 21 2008. With your support, we hope to raise £5,500 to run 30 buses across the capital for four weeks with the slogan: "There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life."

Original target = £5,500.

Currently (8:29am, 22 Oct 08) = £51,480 (and counting!!!)

Yes You Can

This is quite a cool online generator thingy:

Soft Drink Can Generator

Soda. Pop. Coke. Whatever you choose to call it, welcome to the Soft Drink Can Generator, where you can create your own brand of carbonated sugar water. Enter some text, choose an emblem, pick your colors and patterns, and click the 'Go' button. A soft drink can will be generated for you. Collect 'em, trade 'em, put 'em on your website, or e-mail 'em to your friends.

OK, "trade 'em" may be pushing it but it's quite fun. I've gone for a kind of 'knock-off slightly-murky ginger-esque beer' look for mine. Oh, and an added bonus pun for those that know me:

Rhapsody In Blue And White Stripes

Another fantastic Danny Baker moment - a version of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody with every word replaced by a footballer's name. Why? Just because. Listen:


Update: since I bothered to edit the MP3 down, there is now a YouTube version with video and everything:


All together now "Cousins Sealey Mathers ... Pugh Geeeeee".

Brilliant. People are staring at me in the office, chuckling like a simpleton.

Bowled A Google-y

xkcd very good again: xkcd: Going West

At De End Of Der Day

This guy is hilarious, I really like 'Squeaky' Stevie G and the fact that it's apparently been recorded in Lidl:



Actually, Lidl sounds like it should be a Scouse dialect; perhaps a particularly obscure one from the less-leafy bits of Toxteth.

Eh, what's up with 'im? Calm down, he's just talking that Lidl (and that).

Overheard #54

Ah, religion.

"I think my mother thought she could pray it out of me..."

Overheard #53

So we're quite busy at work:

Yes, I had a look this morning at a time before I'd finished doing it yesterday.

Electronic Explorations FTW

Blip.fm strikes again - just stumbled across this weekly podcast from Rob Booth (ex-R1 Breezeblock) with guest appearances from various luminaries of dubstep, minimal electronica & techno:

Electronic Explorations
Very much enjoying Week 021 (Bitesize Beats & 2562) at the moment. And if all that meant nothing whatsoever to you, you're almost certainly saner than me. Carry on.

Dream Caused By The Flight Of A Bee Around A Lollipop?

I do love Danny Baker and catching up with his recent 606 podcast, hidden within a discussion about the wearing of an old Sheffield Wednesday shirt abroad, I was utterly astonished to find out that Salvador Dali designed the Chupa Chups logo:

Actually, so was Danny; he still wasn't buying it at the end of the show. Have a listen:


Excellent!

Luke, I Am Your Purple Dragon

One for offmessage...

Darth Vader on acid

Joke In 'Ere

You couldn't make it up. I do have a small soft spot for Newcastle; whilst at University there, I spent some very happy afternoons in The Strawberry public house, (sadly no longer) right in the shadow of St James's Park. But this is madness:

Joe Kinnear press conference transcript

Well done Joe, way to go mate. Keep the press on your side and you may have had a slim chance. But you've utterly screwed it. If there's anyone that bears a grudge more than policemen and judges, it's journalists.

The Black & White circus continues...

State Of Things

Following a random workplace discussion about potatoes*, I have recently discovered that Iowa's nickname is the Hawkeye State.

I had no idea they were so into their cricket; perhaps a potential venue for a GRACC tour?

ThankyouWembleyandgoodnight!

* marginally less depressing than the FTSE at the moment...

Overheard #52

I forget which of my field operatives reported this, but thanks!

Scene 1. A high-street shop: interior, daytime

"So what is it we've come in here for that we don't want?"